Moving On
by Shauna3
Summary: LL begin their relationship, Jess returns to straighten his life, Dean has some decisions, and everything is out of Rory's control
1. The Aftermath

A/N: Okay this is set after the season finale. That night, Lorelai went back to the inn but then came back early in the morning to go get breakfast with Rory.  
  
Disclaimer: I have nothing to do with the show Gilmore Girls.  
  
Feedback: yes please!  
  
JESS When I got back to my apartment, it suddenly looked very different to me. I guess my time in Stars Hollow really changed me. Suddenly, the apartment that I had been so happy to have began to look dirty and pathetic. "What am I doing?" I mumbled to myself. Sighing, I made my way over to my corner. Without realizing what I was doing, I began to pack what little belongings I had. I finally decided that I couldn't go on here like this. Leaving behind my key and some cash to cover the rent that month, I left that horrible little apartment for good.  
  
RORY  
It's the morning after my "encounter" with Dean. I'm waiting for mom to get ready to go to Luke's. Since when does she have to touch up her make up for Luke? This whole dating thing is going to put a delay on our coffee drinking. I'm hoping everything will be okay between us. After the fight she came out on the front porch with me and I just sat and cried. I think we kind of came to an understanding then. I just... I don't know what's going to happen. I love Dean and he loves me. Why can't we just be together? He wouldn't lie to me would he? This is too much thinking, way too early.  
  
"Mom are you ready?"  
  
"Alright, alright. Let's go."  
  
Things seem to be a little awkward between us. More in that forced normalness kind of way. I guess it's just going to take a little bit of time to get back to normal. Walking into the diner, I couldn't help but smile at how happy my mom and Luke are. Both of their faces lit up when they made eye contact. Suddenly, she grabs me and pulls me back out of the diner.  
  
"Mom? What? What's wrong?"  
  
She stops me by the street and beams. "I didn't get to tell you. Me and Luke, we kissed. Twice!"  
  
"Oh my god! Mom!!! That's great!" Awkwardness has left the building. We hug and recompose ourselves to make a new entrance into the diner. All of its occupants, including Luke, look extremely confused and we laugh some more. Laughing like this feels so good right now.  
  
Breakfast was great. I was happy and distracted. I had about three sips of my second cup of coffee when the diner door opened and in walked Jess. Just in case my life wasn't complicated enough, HE decides to make another dramatic entrance. He doesn't see me yet, which gives me a few minutes to analyze him. He seems more subdued, yet still as confident as ever. He walks up to the counter and without a word, nods upstairs. Luke nods in return and Jess walks up the stairs.  
  
"That, my friend, is good communication skills," My mom has to say it. Then she looks at Luke quizzically.  
  
Luke shrugs. "I'll call you later. Ceaser!! Watch the place." With that said he goes upstairs too.  
  
LUKE  
  
Walking up the stairs, I was trying to figure out every reason possible that Jess would be here. Short of being in some sort of trouble, I really didn't know. When I walked in he was just kind of standing in the middle of the place. I kind of felt bad for him, he looked really lost.  
  
"Hey." I didn't really know what to say.  
  
He nodded. He seemed to be at a loss for words as well. After a few minutes, he finally spoke. "I don't know why I'm here. I just couldn't be there anymore. I... I'm tired of settling. I'm tired of just accepting this as my fate and trying to deal with it. This can't be all there is, right?"  
  
He looked at me then, with his eyes pleading, begging me to tell him that there was more in store for him than a messenger job that barely pays the rent for the smelly cramped apartment that he shares.  
  
"Jess, you're going to be fine. You're better than that life and you're just realizing it now. Everything will work out. I will help you in any way I can. You have so much potential. Just don't give up."  
  
Nodding, he seemed satisfied. "Listen, I have to get back to the diner. You make yourself comfortable and how about we get some dinner later?"  
  
"Okay." Jess sat down and took out a book. I smiled. I really did miss not having him around.  
  
DEAN  
  
I meant what I told Rory. I really did, and honestly, I really do love her. It's just... well... I can't get divorced. I mean divorce sounds so ... messy and so sad. I mean we just got married. I can't be nineteen and divorced. I have to at least give it some time, right? Then this morning, Lindsay made me this huge breakfast. I mean, pancakes, eggs, French toast, everything. She set the table really nice. When I looked surprised, she simply looked happier.  
  
"Dean, I think we should talk." She gestured for me to sit down and so I did. "I made this breakfast as a peace offering. I realize that we've been fighting a lot and I think it's because we aren't communicating well enough. I thought we could have a nice breakfast and a nice talk?"  
  
"Lindsay, I just don't really understand what you expect from me. You want a town house, so I drop out of college and take on extra work. Then you complain that I'm not here enough. I can't do everything."  
  
"Well Dean, what do you want to be doing?"  
  
"I want to see you. I want to be able to enjoy our marriage. I don't want to be working 18 hour days to come home to you upset."  
  
"Dean, I want to see you too. I want us to be able to go out and do things together. I'm bored here Dean. I don't understand why you don't want me to work. Don't you see, then maybe we could both work, but less. Maybe we could both go to school part time. Can't we just try it?"  
  
I sighed. It had always been a sign of weakness in my family if the wife had to work. My family always taught me that a man should be able to support her. Her plan made it all sound so simple though. "Part time. You find a job part time and let's take it from there."  
  
Lindsay smiled. "Thank you!! I think this will really help."  
  
JESS  
  
I'm not sure what I'm going to do now that I'm here. I didn't really have a plan in leaving New York, except that I was headed here. This time I'm going to focus on me. I need to go to school. I need to get a job. I need to straighten out my life. Of course, it's going to be hard here, but that is only because I made it that way. If people here are wary of me, that is only because I made them that way and now I need to come to terms with that. I'm sure people are going to think that part of the reason I'm here is Rory, but really it isn't. I've been wandering around this town all day thinking about her. Those last two times, I really put myself out there, I've never told anyone I loved them. It may have seemed strange that I ran afterward, but at the time, hearing her rejection would have killed me. Literally. I was really bad around that time, desperate, almost suicidal. The last time I came here really helped me out. I was stronger, and it still crushed me when she said no. So that's it. I'm done. I've tried to think of ways to help us but I can't do it on my own. It kills me, because I was so sure of her. It just seemed so right, I was convinced she was my soul mate but I have to let it go. I actually cried today thinking about it but it's the only option. So that's it. I have to put it all behind me now and step into my future. Goodbye Rory Gilmore.  
  
Okay so this chapter was really to set everyone up. I'm still not exactly sure where this is going but I wanted to get the stage set. Please please please review. I have the time to actually write this now, I just need feedback! 


	2. Center of the Universe

A/N: Okay first off thank you to my 2 reviewers!! Yay Daisy Deertree and Sarah1 You guys are awesome!! And even though there's only been 2 so far I think Sarah1 has made up for it by writing a paragraph ( you made me laugh- you're great!) Okay so on with the story.. (and then the reviews)...  
  
Disclaimer: I have nothing to do with the show Gilmore Girls.  
  
Feedback: yes please!  
  
Over dinner that night, Jess and Luke had a long talk. Well it was long for them, considering they both are not the most talkative people. It was soon decided that Jess would take his GED and his SAT's as soon as both were offered. After that, he would be college bound. Jess would be staying in Stars Hollow with Luke at least until college was decided upon. Determined to do well on both of these tests, he headed to the book store for review books.  
  
Walking around the book store brought back many memories for Jess. He remembered how it seemed one of the few places he was comfortable at in this town. He also remembered the many occasions that he and Rory had gone browsed the store together. Sighing he picked up a couple of the review books. That was all over, that portion of his life he had decided to leave behind. Sometimes, it hurts more to try to fix all that is wrong than to walk away from it and start anew. His relationship with Rory, he decided, was one of those things.  
  
Of course, he could not leave the store without first browsing the classical literature section. After a few minutes of having his nose stuck in a book, he realized he was being watched. When he looked up, he saw those same piercing blue eyes that broke his heart only a few days ago. He sighed –this is not what he needed right now.  
  
"Oh my god Jess. Seriously, did you not get the point the other day? I have enough to deal with right now. Why can't you just stay away from me? I thought I was pretty clear when I said no. Nobody wants you here so you should just go home." Rory was furious. Okay so she wasn't exactly mad at him, well she was somewhat, but he just got to be the lucky person that she exploded at.  
  
Jess stared at her silently for a whole minute. What is wrong with her? This is not the Rory I know. Something must have happened. He opened his mouth intending to be calm, intending to simply inform her that his intentions were only to buy these books and go straight home to Luke's, but instead his words came out slightly different.  
  
"You know what Rory? Everything is not always about you. I'm sorry to disappoint you but my being here right now has absolutely nothing to do with you. I'm doing this for me. For once in my life I am totally thinking about myself and my future. I know this might sound totally implausible to you but I have other things in my life than you. The entire world does not revolve around Rory Gilmore."  
  
Rory stood there in shock. She felt tears burning in her eyes threatening to poor out at any second. Not wanting him to see her cry, she turned and ran out of the store. Frustrated, Jess walked to the counter, paid for his books, and went back to the diner.  
  
Walking into her house, Rory was happy to see her mom was not home. Even though the two of them were on good terms again, there still was a lot of unsolved issues. Also, the encounter at the book store was really bothering her. Was it just embarrassment? Was it possible that some of what he said had a twinge of truth to it? Was that slight disappointment she felt?  
  
Sighing, she picked up her phone. Why hadn't Dean called her yet? It had been almost an entire day. She didn't want to call him in case Lindsay answered and was upset over the divorce. Oh god, he was still getting divorced right? Deciding she didn't want to think about any of this anymore, Rory tried to go to sleep. She must have worn herself out that day because sleep came quickly.  
  
Lorelai was busy at the inn when Luke finally called her. "Luke! I've been dying to hear, what happened, what's going on? Why's he here? How long is he staying?"  
  
Luke smiled, in his head guessing the cups of coffee Lorelai had today. His mind settled on 7 before he responded. "Well, he said he's ready to make something of himself. He decided to stop thinking that he deserves all the bad things in his life and make something good happen for a change. He's going to take some tests and try to get into college. He sounds pretty serious."  
  
"Wow. So... college? Well good. He's a smart kid, I'm glad he's finally realizing it. So this, uh, isn't going to delay our date tomorrow night, will it?"  
  
"It should have no effect on it. Unless of course you want him to join us, but I don't think you're his type."  
  
"Darn. I'll have to find another of my daughter's ex boyfriends to bring."  
  
"Okay so I'll see you tomorrow morning and we'll figure out details?"  
  
"Sounds good. Bye"  
  
"Bye"  
  
The next day, Rory stayed home all day. She had told her mother that she wasn't feeling good that morning and had not gotten out of bed since. In reality, she just did not want to face the day. She didn't want to chance seeing Jess in Luke's and she didn't want to be awake to acknowledge the fact that Dean had yet to call.  
  
Dean didn't know what to do on his lunch break. Usually, Lindsay would bring him food, or a picnic. Today she was out looking for a job and he was alone. One more thing he didn't like about her working. He pulled out his phone and dialed Rory's number.  
  
"Hello?" She sounded groggy, as if she had been sleeping. He looked at his watch, 12:30.  
  
"Hey, Rory. It's Dean. Are you okay? Did I wake you?"  
  
She immediately perked up. "What? Oh uh no. I'm fine. What are you doing?"  
  
Dean laughed. It was cute how happy she suddenly sounded. "I'm at work. Long day today. So um the other day, um it was amazing."  
  
Rory smiled thinking about it. "Yeah.. it definitely was."  
  
"So is your mom okay? Did she know?"  
  
"Yeah.. well she definitely knew. She isn't thrilled. At the same time, I don't think she's going to hurt you too much. It's a good thing she liked you before all this. She just, I don't know.. she doesn't think that you love me, I guess."  
  
"Oh, Rory, you know that isn't true. That's what's important, anyway, that we know."  
  
"So, when do I get to see you again?" She smacked herself for allowing it to come out so hopeful.  
  
"Definitely soon. Things are getting really complicated, but definitely soon. Oh I gotta go Rory, time to get back to work. Love you, bye."  
  
Before she could say anything back, he hung up. 


	3. Muffin, Cookie or Sugar

A/N: Yay!! The reviews are starting to pick up!! You guys are absolutely wonderful!!! Thank you so much for the encouragement (Sarah1!!) and all the other compliments and input. I'm really trying to update as much as possible so here goes the next part...  
  
Disclaimer: I have nothing to do with the show Gilmore Girls.  
  
Feedback: yes please!  
  
Luke and Lorelai walked into the diner together. Since Rory wasn't feeling good, Lorelai had asked to change their date into a lunch date. After lunch, she had declared that she wanted coffee from the diner. They walked in and she took a seat at the counter while he busied himself with fulfilling her request. She looked over at Jess who was reading his practice SAT book behind the counter.  
  
"So when are they?" she asked, mostly because she wanted to make conversation. They hadn't spoken really since he had been back and she wanted to see how much he had really changed.  
  
"Next Saturday." He looked back to the book.  
  
Luke brought her coffee to her and she smiled mischievously at him. "Thank you my loooove."  
  
Luke rolled his eyes. "Don't call me that."  
  
"Well how about muffin? Or cookie? Oh, oh and sugar?"  
  
"Nothing that has to do with food."  
  
Lorelai pouted. "Fine. I'll think of something even better. Now, however, I have to go back to work." She leaned over the counter, kissed him and then left.  
  
Jess looked up at Luke. "So muffin, it looks kind of serious."  
  
Luke glared at him. "Speaking of serious topics, have you seen Rory yet?"  
  
Jess sighed. Trying to decide how much of his story to tell he scanned the diner. It was totally empty. Well, he might as well tell Luke everything so that he would at least understand.  
  
"I went to see her at Yale." As he said this he stared at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the world. Luke didn't really know where he was going with this statement, because it wasn't exactly what he had asked. However, seeing that it was hard for Jess to talk about, he tried to be encouraging. "When?"  
  
Jess looked up momentarily as though he totally forgot where he was. "Oh um after I left here, after the wedding. I had read that book and thought maybe I should express my feelings. The only thing is that I didn't really plan what I wanted to say. Then when I got there Dean was there and they came walking up to her room together. I guess that threw me off. So when she asked what I wanted I asked her to come away with me."  
  
Luke looked surprised by all this news. Dean was at Rory's dorm? Jess asked her to come with him? That is some serious stuff. He kept quiet so that Jess could continue.  
  
"Well she kept saying no. I was trying to make her understand that I had changed, that I was dependable now. I told her how I knew we were supposed to be together from the moment I saw her and how she knew it too. She just kept saying no. I told her to only say no if she really did not want to be with me." He paused another moment and then said much quieter, "then she said no."  
  
Luke felt really bad for him. He knew how much he really cared about her and realized that bad boy Jess must have been absolutely crushed when she said that. "And now? Have you seen her now?"  
  
Jess appeared to gain some strength. "Now is totally different. You see I've decided the best thing that I can do is to let it go. I can't...I ..how can I get my life together, when I am sitting agonizing over a girl who obviously wants nothing to do with me? So it kills me, but I'm moving on. Sure that doesn't mean I'm totally over her and maybe I never will be, but I'm done. That's what's important. I did run into her at the book store last night though, it wasn't pretty."  
  
Luke smiled at him. God that is one strong kid, he thought. "Well I haven't heard anything from Lorelai about you starting trouble with Rory so it couldn't have been too bad. Although, they do have a lot of other stuff going on right now.  
  
Jess smirked. "Oh, it was pretty bad. She walked up and yelled at me for not leaving her alone. She was thinking I came here just to make her life miserable, you know? So I lost it. I guess I was tired of being the bad guy. I told her my being here had nothing to do with her and that the world doesn't revolve around her. It was just an altogether bad encounter. She did seem a little out of it though, what's going on with her and Lorelai?"  
  
Luke was not really sure how much he should be telling. He didn't want to betray anyone's trust, but at the same time, Jess had been so open with him, he felt he should return the favor. "Okay Jess this stays between you and me."  
  
"Darnit I was so looking forward to talking to Miss Patty about our conversations today."  
  
"Jess you know what I mean. This is big. Okay I don't know if I should even tell you this because it might just upset you more. The other night, the one before you got here, Lorelai went home and found Rory and Dean...well... they had just finished...um you know."  
  
"Having sex?" Jess offered, praying that he was wrong.  
  
"Yeah... that... So of course, not only are they not together but he's still married. Lorelai was devastated." He was going to continue but he noticed that Jess, while trying to maintain an indifferent expression, had paled a few shades. "I'm sorry Jess."  
  
"Well, looks like she's got a few issues of her own to be working through." Jess shrugged and walked out the diner. Luke sighed and went back to work.  
  
When Dean got home from work that day, Lindsay was waiting with dinner all ready. She was in a pretty dress and she had just begun to light some candles. She was really working hard at this marriage.  
  
"Wow, everything looks amazing." Dean smiled at her. She was so beautiful.  
  
"Well I figured that you had a long day and would be hungry. Also I have some good news." Lindsay smiled hopefully as they sat down to eat.  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"I got a job!! I don't start for a few days but I'm so excited. It's part time just like you said. Also, it pays pretty good."  
  
"That's great. Where is it?" He was a lot happier than he thought he would be, mostly because of how excited she was.  
  
"It's at the bookstore."  
  
Dean suddenly was a lot less happy. The bookstore? Why did it have to be there? Rory is always in there. They couldn't be around each other that much. "The bookstore? Why the bookstore? You aren't really into reading. Do you know enough about books? Maybe you should try somewhere else." He said all of this before realizing how it would sound to her.  
  
"You just don't want me to work, do you? The book store is great because for one thing they are looking for part time help. Since that's all you will allow me to work it fits. Also, I figured if I were to take a class or two, I could get some homework done there. God Dean, can't you just be happy for me?  
  
"I'm sorry.. I didn't mean.. I mean... it sounds good. When do you start?"  
  
"He's going to call me tomorrow and let me know."  
  
"Ok, you know I am happy for you."  
  
"Mmhmm." They finished the dinner in silence.  
  
When Lorelai got home from work, Rory was still in bed. She looked at her daughter, in her flying piggy pajamas and smiled. She looked so innocent, so young. She sighed and entered.  
  
"Rory sweetie, how are you feeling?"  
  
"What? Oh hi mom. I'm okay, I guess. I'm just so tired."  
  
Lorelai nodded and sat on the bed. "You want to talk?"  
  
"Not really. I think I'm just going to read a little."  
  
"You know, I may not approve of what happened, but you can still talk to me about it. I mean, if you want to."  
  
"I know mom, just not yet."  
  
"Ok." It was all she could say. She couldn't force her daughter to tell her if she had heard from him, or what was said. She would just have to wait this one out. 


	4. Hurts Too Much

A/N: Thank you guys for all the reviews. You guys are all so encouraging I love you all. You really make writing this story a lot of fun!  
  
Disclaimer: I have nothing to do with the show Gilmore Girls.  
  
Feedback: yes please!  
  
Jess sat in his room the rest of the day. He was trying to write, but nothing seemed to come out. All that played over and over in his mind was the fact that Rory had sex. At first when he went up the stairs, he tried to read. He told himself that since he had given up on trying to form a relationship with her, this did not bother him. After a little while of his unsuccessful attempt at reading he gave in. So what if it did bother him? Didn't it usually bother people to see their exes move on? Allowing himself to feel some of the hurt, he tried to sort out the feelings on paper. He stared down at the only words he had written in the past three hours of trying.  
  
"Some things hurt too much to put into words."  
  
Deciding he was going to go crazy sitting there, he tucked the paper in his journal and decided to go "out."  
  
Dean spent the next day at work. He honestly didn't know what to do. It's not like he wanted to lead Rory on, he really did love her. When he thought that there had been nothing left with him and Lindsay, he analyzed the situation with Rory. Then, he had thought about how much he loved her, but couldn't go from being married to having the little kid relationship that they used to have. Of course, she had showed him the other night that she was ready for a more serious relationship, but now Lindsay has shown him that there are ways they can make it work. She was his wife, so she should get priority, right? It is just...he really didn't want to lose Rory again. He also knew that if he hurt her, that would be the end for good. There would be no friends after this, this is an all or nothing situation. Realizing that all this serious thinking was making him try to attach a door upside down, he tried to push the thoughts out of his mind until later when he could call her.  
  
Rory decided she had to get up and do something the next day. It had been a couple of days and she had still not told Lane about what happened. If she didn't tell her soon, she knew that Lane would be upset when she did finally find out. Rory was just so nervous about how she would react. What if she had the same reaction that her mom had had? She couldn't bare that.  
  
When she got to Lane's apartment, she was relieved to see that they were alone. "RORY!!!" Her best friend jumped through the doorway as she was about to knock.  
  
"Hey Lane," Rory was smiling. Lane could always make her feel better.  
  
"Rory guess what?? I made you coffee!"  
  
"You know Lane you are a great hostess."  
  
"Why thank you Rory." Lane looked so happy. This apartment thing was really good for her.  
  
"Okay now that I'm the best hostess in the world, tell me your news."  
  
"I said great not the best." Rory smiled, still a little nervous about telling her.  
  
"Uh oh you're trying to avoid it. Is it great? Scandalous? Did Jess make you another totally crazy but in a great wonderful romantic kind of way offer? Did you say yes?"  
  
"No no no...Actually I did run in to him but that was just really embarrassing..It involved me yelling at him and him telling me that he wasn't here for me like I had assumed. That was just... Okay, here it is. You know how me and Dean have been hanging out kind of lately?"  
  
"Oh my god, you kissed Dean! What is it with you and kissing before thinking!"  
  
"Well it wasn't exactly that. You see, the other day, my mom's inn opening day, he came to my house. I was there getting CDs for my mom and he just showed up. He was telling me about the problems that he and Lindsay are having and how they are getting a divorce. I'm not sure if people are supposed to know that yet so you know.. just don't tell anyone any of this. So then, I don't know, suddenly he was kissing me and then it just got carried away. But in a really good way."  
  
It took a moment for Lane to fully understand what she was saying. Rory turned bright red and then Lane's mouth dropped wide open. "Oh my god...this is huge! You guys had sex? Rory this is so unlike you! He's still married though right? I mean wow, scandalous was an understatement. What's going to happen? And when? Does Lindsay know? What was it like -was it good? You were safe right? This is too much at once.."  
  
Rory couldn't help but laugh. Her friend had gone into overload. "Well I talked to him once so far and we're going to hang out again soon. I mean I guess he's just got a lot to sort out. He said he's going to ask for a divorce and then we can be together again. He's so great, Lane. You know he's just so reliable and trustworthy. I'm so excited. Of course, my mother came home right after we finished and flipped out. But... she loved Dean. When she sees that he meant all that he said to me, I think she'll get over it."  
  
"So wait though... he didn't even ask for the divorce yet?" Lane was having her doubts.  
  
"Well not yet, but you know, they've been having problems. They both know it is coming. Don't worry Lane. This is Dean, remember?"  
  
"Yeah. Of course. Dean is a good guy." Lane was still very worried about the situation. She decided, however, that she needed to be supporting so that if everything crumbled in on Rory, she could be there.  
  
Rory smiled. At least she had someone she could talk to in this.  
  
The next morning Rory woke to the sound of her phone receiving a text message. Through half open eyes, she read it. "Good morning! I love you!" It was from Dean. She smiled. He was going through so much right now and he still was thoughtful enough to do things like this. Her mother's voice broke through the dark.  
  
"Honey are we allowed to go to Luke's yet for breakfast?  
  
Rory frowned. "I want Al's."  
  
"Okay okay. I guess I can wait until lunch to see my BOYFRIEND" She put an emphasis on the word boyfriend. She was still almost giddy about it.  
  
The two of them were having a good breakfast. Rory was telling Lorelai all about Lane's new apartment and Lorelai was telling Rory about her date with Luke from the night before.  
  
In mid sentence, Rory's face dropped. "Um you know what mom, I'm not really as hungry as I thought I was. And... I got this thing. I got to go do it now... I ...um"  
  
Following Rory's eyes, Lorelai suddenly saw what all the panic was about. A few tables over, completely oblivious to their eyes, were Dean and Lindsay. They were eating and happily talking. They did not look like a couple in the middle of a divorce. The two of the seemed so cozy, if one picked up food and fed the other she wouldn't be surprised. "Oh... Rory honey," Before Lorelai could say anything else Rory was up and running out of the restaurant.  
  
Lorelai was stuck. Rory obviously didn't want her to follow, which was her first instinct. Her second instinct was to go over and yell at Dean. She couldn't do that because as much as she didn't want Rory to get hurt, she didn't want Rory with Dean. Therefore causing a scene in front of his wife may be a problem. Giving up, she simply asked for a to-go cup of coffee, paid the bill and went to work. 


	5. Very High Demand

A/N Sorry about the delay, but I'm back!! I promise!! Soooo...please review away!!!!  
  
Disclaimer: Gilmore Girls is still not mine  
  
Rory didn't know where to go. After walking around aimlessly for about an hour, she finally settled on the bridge. The only one who would disturb her there would be Jess and since they were avoiding each other, he probably wouldn't come.  
  
Once she was comfortable, she finally allowed herself to think about what she had seen. Why were they so happy? Even if he hadn't asked for a divorce yet, they were having problems weren't they? At breakfast they had seemed like they did when they first got married, nauseatingly in love. How could Dean act like that knowing he had slept with another woman?  
  
She pulled out her cell phone and read the text message from earlier that morning. 'Good morning! I love you!' "He does," she said aloud to herself, "I know he does." Tears were flowing freely down her face now.  
  
"You okay?" The voice scared her so much she almost dropped the phone into the water.  
  
"God Jess, you shouldn't sneak up on people on a bridge."  
  
A smirk appeared on his face before returning to his concerned expression. "You didn't answer my question, are you okay?"  
  
"Why does it matter to you, you don't care about me, remember?" She cringed when she heard the words leaving her mouth. Okay so maybe I'm still bitter about being wrong, she admitted to herself.  
  
Jess sadly shook his head. "Rory, just because I'm not looking to you for a relationship doesn't mean I don't still care about you as a person. You know this, don't take your anger at Dean out on me."  
  
She froze. How does he know about Dean? Oh God, he knows about Dean. Beginning to panic, her eyes darted around for an escape from this conversation. She began to stand.  
  
"I know, you probably didn't want me to know about that, and you probably aren't supposed to know that I know about that. But Rory, as someone who has already screwed up more times in his life than you ever will, maybe I'm not such a bad person to talk to about it."  
  
Sighing, she sat back down, deciding that he had a point. She still refused to look at him. She couldn't, she knew he could read her too well.  
  
"Or if you don't want to talk, we could just sit. We could read." He offered her a book.  
  
Back at the diner, Lorelai had just arrived for her afternoon coffee. Seeing that she wasn't her usual happy self, Luke asked her to come upstairs.  
  
"Are you okay? You seem really upset today."  
  
Lorelai sighed. It's just all this stuff with Rory. She saw Lindsay and Dean having breakfast this morning. She wanted to go to Al's, I guess to avoid Jess and I'm guessing that Dean picked there to avoid her. Anyway they seemed really happy and Rory just kind of ran out. So now she's all upset and she can't talk to me about it because I reacted so horrible in the first place. God Luke I just don't understand when things got so complicated. It's just such a bad time because I'm so happy about us but I don't want to be too happy in front of her and then I'm just so worried about what she's going to do. She doesn't know how to handle things like this."  
  
Luke wiped a tear from her eye and kissed her forehead. "It's all going to be okay. Don't worry about anything. She's a smart girl and if things get to rough, she knows she can always turn to you. You are an amazing mother. As for us, we can take things slow until this blows over. Don't worry."  
  
"Thank you for being so great."   
  
Dean and Lindsay were lying in bed. He had the day off and after a great morning, they had found that they couldn't keep their hands off of each other. Dean couldn't believe how much better things had been getting.  
  
"Today was great."  
  
Lindsay turned to look at him. "Yes. It really was. I'm so glad we're trying at this. It seems to be making such a difference. I love you so much."  
  
"I love you too. I really don't want to move right now."  
  
"Well I need to go take a shower, care to join?"  
  
Dean smiled. "Moving doesn't seem so hard anymore." They both headed towards the bathroom laughing.  
  
Jess and Rory had been sitting on the bridge each quietly reading for an hour. Finally she spoke.  
  
"Dean wouldn't lie. If that's what you think, he wouldn't do it. He's Dean, he's dependable, honest, he's safe. And.. and I didn't screw up. We're going to be together. This morning, he ..he was just pretending. You know so she didn't make a scene."  
  
Somewhat surprised by her outburst Jess looked at her silently for a moment. "What about this morning?"  
  
"I saw them having breakfast. They were at Al's. They looked really happy and it freaked me out. But I mean, they're not going to fight in public right? They have to be nice to each other in public."  
  
"I don't know Rory. I don't really know the whole situation." He didn't want to upset her more.  
  
"I love him. He loves me. They're getting a divorce and we're going to be together. It's simple. I mean, he told me he loved me this morning right before breakfast so he hasn't changed his mind."  
  
She still wouldn't meet his eyes with her own. She didn't have to. He knew what he would see. He knew all about the uncertainty, the fear. He remained silent. There was nothing he could say that would make her feel better because he would not allow himself to lie to her anymore.  
  
"He hasn't told her yet. He hasn't told her about the divorce, or about us. I could tell. Why hasn't he told her yet?"  
  
It was then that she finally looked at him. Tears filled her eyes. The question had such a simple answer but he was not willing to say it. "Rory, that's something that you are going to have to ask him." The tears began to spill and she crawled timidly into his arms.  
  
When Jess returned to the diner later Luke appeared exhausted. "You okay Luke? You want me to close up?"  
  
"Do you mind? Dealing with a super stressed Lorelai takes a lot out of you."  
  
Jess smirked. "Hey I had to deal with the daughter, I think that's a lot more work."  
  
"You talked to Rory?" Luke was surprised, but relieved that she had someone to talk to after what he heard about the morning.  
  
"Yeah we read more than talked, but there was some talking involved. More on her part. I figured I better keep my opinions to myself on this one."  
  
Luke smiled. "I'm fine to close. Listen someone from the SAT's called you the numbers on your bed."  
Jess headed up the stairs and grabbed the phone. Why would they be calling him? Did they think he cheated or something? Did they lose it? They better not have, he actually studied for once.  
  
"Hello? SAT Scoring and Reporting office, how may I help you?"  
  
"Hi, this is Jess Mariano returning Robert Alsanda's call."  
  
"Hold please."  
  
After about a minute of horrible hold music, the call was finally picked up.  
  
"Mr. Mariano?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Hi this is Robert Alsanda. I had just called you earlier today to commend you on an astonishing job on your test."  
  
"Huh. I did that good that I get a phone call?"  
  
"Mr. Mariano, you got a perfect score. College recruiting time has just begun and I have a feeling you are going to find yourself in very high demand. Congratulations."  
  
"No shit. Your serious?"  
  
A laugh was heard on the other end of the phone. "Absolutely."  
  
"Wow, thanks." He hung up the phone and stared at it for a couple minutes.  
  
"It doesn't bite you know."  
  
"Luke."  
  
"So what was that all about?"  
  
"Oh um that... nothing... it was just..."  
  
"Well? I never heard of them calling with grades before so what happened?"  
  
Jess turned to face Luke, still somewhat shocked. "I got a 1600. A perfect score."  
  
Luke was elated. "Alright!" The two men hugged.  
  



	6. You're Not Listening

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

For the second morning in a row, Rory Gilmore woke up to her cell phone receiving a new message. Knowing it had to be Dean, she braced herself for whatever it said. "I have a break at two meet me at the gazebo?" Rory smiled, happy that she would finally get to see him.

She got dressed and made her way into the diner. The diner was empty with the obvious exception of Jess and Luke who appeared to be having a somewhat serious conversation across the counter. Seeing Rory, Luke said, "Maybe you should go to Yale. I hear it's not too bad."

"College? You're going to college?" Rory was immediately excited. "You would love college."

"I wouldn't go that far." Jess responded, amused at her enthusiasm.

Luke handed her a coffee and walked into the back.

"So I see you're looking better today."

Rory smiled. "Yeah sorry about that... yesterday was just... everything should be okay now."

Jess nodded.

"So you're really going to college?"

"Yeah. Well, eventually. I don't really have the money but I'm looking. I'll apply for some financial aid and try to get some independent scholarships. Maybe someone will feel bad and give me some money."

Rory smiles, happy that she can finally talk to Jess this way. Glancing at the clock, she sees it's time to go meet Dean.

"Well I have to go, thanks again for yesterday." She flashes a smile and leaves the diner.

Dean was already at the gazebo when she arrived. She reaches up to kiss him but he turns his head and hugs her instead.

Trying to pretend that his small refusal was in her head she says, "I finally get to see you. I've missed you."

Dean smiles at her. "I've missed you too."

"So you want to get lunch... or go somewhere... or..."

"No... listen, Rory, we need to talk."

"Oh did you talk to Lindsay? How did she take it?" Her face showed hope trying to cover all fear.

"Well actually yes I did talk to Lindsay... she... we... Rory I think you were right to begin with. I think our problems are really just about adjusting. I think... we're working things out. I mean you and I ... we were great it's just, we're at such different stages in our lives." He refused to meet her eyes.

"What?? How can you say that. Dean, we're perfect together. You love me, you told me that. We were so happy. We can make things work. You're not happy with Lindsay, I can make you happy." Tears filled her eyes and she looked away.

"No Rory. I'm married. That's it. I swore to love Lindsay for better or for worse. We're going to make it through this, we just needed to learn to communicate."

"But we already do that Dean. Don't you understand? We can do this. You and I. Just like it was always supposed to be. We can make it work."

"Rory. You're not listening. I don't want to make it work." With that statement he turned and left her there, the tears finally flowing freely.

Never having had to deal with a situation like this, Rory thought it best to act like nothing had happened. She told no one about the conversation she had had with Dean the previous day. She went about her normal routine. She woke up, went to Luke's and then went to the bookstore. Satisfied that she had found three books that suited her mood perfectly, she approached the counter. It was then that her invincible façade ended. She was so surprised to see Lindsay at the check out that at first she could only smile.

"Hi Rory, how has your summer been so far?" Lindsay decided that for the sake of her job and working things out with her husband, she had better be nice to Rory.

"Oh uh, um good. I mean it hasn't really started but good I guess. You?"

"It's been okay. Stressful, you know starting a new job and all. Your total is 27.13"

Rory handed her the money and as Lindsay was counting her change, something in Rory's head snapped. She decided that this person, not three feet away from her, was responsible for all the pain she had been feeling lately.

"Well I'm glad things are working out for you. I told Dean that if he was just honest with you and told you what happened between us that you would probably love him enough to work things out with him." Rory flashed Lindsay her most innocent smile and left.

Lindsay stood with a blank expression on her face for about five minutes before realizing she had another customer.

"Oh sorry Jess, um just that one?"

"Yeah." He had witnessed the whole scene and was really surprised that Rory would so something like that.

After paying he hesitated for a minute seeing her pained expression. "You should call him" He suggested. She nodded. Then he was gone.

"Hello?"

"Dean."

"Lindsay? What's wrong honey?"

"Dean. Dean what happened between you and Rory?"

"What? Who said.. What did you hear?"

"You slept with her didn't you?"

"Well.. Lindsay we shouldn't talk about this over the phone."


	7. Goodbye

A/N Okay this one's really short but I felt like it should be by itself.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Rory had the night to herself. Lorelei had to work late and so after a night of movies, food, reading and some wallowing she decided to go to bed. Just as she was getting into bed, there was a knock at the door.

"Dean, uh, hi..." She didn't know how to greet him. It had been a few days since they last talked and a few days since her encounter with Lindsay. She hadn't heard anything about either one of them in that time and was wondering if Lindsay had approached him about it.

"I don't know why I'm here."

"Okay, well do you want to come in? I was going to bed but I could.."

"How could you do this?"

"What?" She knew what he was talking about but didn't quite have any explanation.

"You know what Rory. How could you tell her? Why couldn't you just leave us alone? You're not happy so we have to be miserable too?"

"Dean that's not fair. Anyway, as your wife I think she deserves to know what kind of person she'd married too."

"What kind of person? What are you talking about. Obviously I can't be that terrible of a person if you want me so much. You know one day you're telling me how much you love me and the next I'm this horrible person. People make mistakes."

"So now I'm just a mistake? You told me you loved me too you know. God, I can't stand this."

"You don't love me. Everyone knows it. Everyone knew it about halfway through our relationship and we just refused to believe it. Don't you understand that nothing is going to change that? I love Lindsay and I thank God that she loves me enough to work through this."

"You guys made up? After all this you guys are still together?"

"Why disappointed?"

"Just surprised."

"Well unlike you she knows how to forgive."

"What are you talking about? I forgive people."

"What about Jess? How many times did he try to make it up to you? You love him and yet you just can't accept that people make mistakes."

"Jess? Oh my God this has nothing, I repeat NOTHING to do with Jess. I have no feelings whatsoever for Jess. We're friends. I've FORGIVEN him enough to be friends. Anyway, since when are you defending Jess?"

"I'm not it's just... never mind this isn't what I came over here for. I just wanted to tell you that I think you did a really mean thing the other day. I also wanted to say goodbye."

"Goodbye?"

"We're moving. Lindsay and I decided to move to Chicago. We just want to go somewhere without so much history and start over. So we're going as soon as possible. Goodbye Rory." Dean turned and left without looking back.

"Goodbye Dean," she whispered as he got into his car.

Lying in bed, Rory tried to figure out what exactly it was that she was feeling. She wasn't sad that he was leaving, she was just lonely. She felt totally alone. Suddenly there was no safe boyfriend waiting in the wings for her. From now on, she was on her own.


End file.
